I Just Don't Know... Why Do I Feel This Way?
"I just don't understand, why do I feel this way?" A question that those who are in a depressed mood tend to ask themselves, especially when their mood has taken a sudden change. There have been times where I've actually went from smiling one day and then the next day all I did was cry and sleep in order to make it through to next day. So many days I wish there was either a do-over button or a skip button. Getting through these emotional periods can be rough and brutal, the emotions are constantly racing; you feel alone, worthless, and just flat out exhausted.
The only good thing about these moments is that the alone time you desperately need can turn into a time of reflection and release. How? Well, by simply writing your emotions down. That's the release part. You get to write down every feeling and thought. Next step, writing down what triggered these feelings.
I was in a funk for over three consecutive days; not even the antidepressants could console me. I was feeling lost, confused, and like a failure. I wasn't sure why I kept crying on my way to work and then again on my way home. The fourth day I took my mental health day, and just sat and reflected on what was causing me to feel so "ugh!" Well, two people had quit from my team the previous week, and then my son wasn't doing well in school, which caused me paranoia when my phone rang. In addition to this, my personal relationships were nonexistent.
Basically all of these occurrences began to affect me all at once; especially since I wasn't talking about it. I was keeping this bottled up and when that happens... well emotions overflow. Understanding what triggered the feelings allowed me to realize that I needed to release my thoughts, and that I needed a life, and a break.
We can overwork and overthink ourselves into a mental coma. Life won't always be perfect, so you have to find ways to perfect your life. Take your "me" time, reflect, and release.